No one ever PLANS to go to Rock Bottom Cafe in Tecom...it just somehow, kinda, seems to, end up happening.
You'll be having a great night out; the drinks are flowing, the music's pumping but the bar closes and you have absolutely no intention of going straight home. And then it happens, that moment someone mentions that old faithful "Rocky B's is probably still open".
Before you know it, (did you even agree to this?) you're rocking up outside the infamous American diner meets karaoke bar meets club...again.
Here are the feelings you'll experience once you get inside...
Why does the bouncer recognise you? Did you always have to take a lift downstairs? And did it always look so grungy? You've been here before but it's a vague, blurry memory (this could well be down to the one too many shots you did last time).
Downstairs, the band is pelting out some U2 classic but the crowd hasn't a clue what it is, or in fact a clue about anything at all...like balance for example. It's like watching a field of Bambis trying to take their first steps. This is not how you remembered it...is this even the right place?
You head to the bar and decide to order a Bull Frog; a toxic green liquid that's synonymous with Rock Bottoms (if you haven't tried one before, you don't go there enough). Without even a second thought, you down it in one. Go hard or go home right? Er...NO.
Did you actually just down a Bull Frog?
You've changed...everything in here is soooooo good, right? "I lurrrrrve this song" is all anyone is saying.
AAaahhhhhhh this is the Rocky B's you remember so fondly.
YES! Tonight is the night; you're in flying form and feeling good. There are PLENTY of eligibles around, you've just got to pick one.
You come to your senses soon enough to realise that future spouse material doesn't lurk around Rock Bottoms at 3am.
The band finishes and staff are ushering people towards the exit; you're in no way ready to leave the dance floor..."ONE MORE TUUUUUUUUNE"
Is that pizza? And it's free? Okay, so you'll leave the dance floor for FREE pizza. You wobble over and grab what you can carry – three slices in one hand, phone in the other. You walk towards the exit with as much dignity as possible...which is very little.
As you strut past the fools paying for a shawarma outside the lifts, (you've had your fill of pizza already). And you know a better shawarma place on the way home for your second dinner of the early hours.
Classic morning-after-the-night at Rock Bottoms fear...WHAT DID I DO IN THERE!?!
If you would like to experience these feelings first-hand, Rock Bottoms Cafe is located in Tecom, Al Barsha and is open everyday until 3am.
Call 04 4500111 for more details