Ever asked your colleague what the weather will be like tomorrow, nah…us neither. Ever freaked out to your housemate because there’s no food in the fridge…nope. You forget to grab some water from the shop on the way home from work and now you’re moaning to the wife because you’ll have to pop back out in your pjs? Nope…these things DO NOT happen in Dubai. Here’s a whole host of other things that you’ll never say either…

1. “Don’t forget your umbrella”

Admittedly we do have a few drizzly days, but they’re so few and far between. And no one actually OWNS an umbrella….do they?

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2. “I’m going to stay in all weekend…can’t really think of anything to do”

Even when there’s nothing to do (which is never)…Dubai has awesome beaches to sort your tan out for free!

3. “But does Nandos deliver?”

ha ha ha ha…Of COURSE THEY DELIVER

4. “I wonder what the world’s tallest building is?”

Unless you’re asking in a totally ‘eye-rolling’ sarcastic way of course

5. “Wow…DEWA is so easy to sort out without my visa application in place”

6. “I can’t think of a single place to eat at”

7. “There’s not enough Michelin-starred, celebrity chefs opening restaurants here”

Just, pretty much one a month

8. “I love the queues at Geant and Carrefour”

We’re spending about 20-years of our lives in these lines, only to then get in the queue for a cab home

9. “These damn tax returns are the worst…THE WORST”

Quite possibly the best thing you’ll never have to say

10. “Lets take the stairs”

…we’re only on the 43rd floor. Er…NO!

11. “Don’t worry about it, admin will get that sorted out real quick”

Get used to the ‘long, slow way round’ with everything 

12. “Wow, the booze is really cheap here”

yeah…unless you’ve found a happy hour we need to know about!

Now read: 14 Reasons Why You’re Totally Spoilt Living In Dubai