Are you a banana?

‘Cus I find you a-peel-ingggg.

While a cute card and a humble pun will do most of you for Valentine’s Day, we’re in a city of superlatives: The biggest. The most luxurious. The most expensive. And when it comes to Valentine’s Day, you begin to see just how true this really is.

This week, we reported a Dubai restaurant offering an AED1 MILLION Valentine’s Package. People were blown away, is someone really gonna blow 1 million to propose? Unsurprisingly, the news was a domino effect, and we’re unearthing more OTT Valentine’s Day celebrations than you can swing a cat at. Flowers costing more than a salary, heli-rides, Presidential suite stays… Here’s how the 0.001 % will celebrate Valentine’s Day in Dubai this year.

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The ‘my heart is yours’ bouquet can be yours for the princely sum of AED4,200

Don’t worry folks, unlike most bouquets, these won’t wither, fade and die after a couple of days. The roses are ‘lovingly preserved’ so will actually last you a lifetime. Who needs diamonds!

Pay AED500,000 for a night to remember that includes a Tiffany collection (!) and one of the city’s most famous pools decked out in flowers. Just. For. You.

Ce La Vie is charging half a million for a 12-course dining experience, at this fine-dining resto perched on top of Adress Sky View. Not just dins, the high-end package includes a one-night stay in the hotel’s Presidential Suite, no less, a Valentine’s themed floral arch, limo pick-up, 1001 roses, oh and did we mention the Tiffany ATLAS X Collection? Including a bangle, a pendant, a ring, earrings… the lot!

Where? Level 54, Address Skyview Hotel

This AED1 Million package includes a Rolls-Royce trip, a helicopter, a yacht and two meals

This is pretty much a whole day of luxury-packed goodness.

Kicking off with a Rolls Royce ride to the VIP helipad for a beautiful 45-minute trip across Dubai. Followed by a lavish meal for two at Argentina Grill, more meals, 5,000 roses and the cherry on top? An Aquae Jewel 5-carat diamond ring all included in the package.

Read the full run-down of this crazy itinerary here.

Where? Argentina Grill are hosting this extravagant deal

A private villa in one of Dubai’s most luxe beach resorts could be yours for AED12k

This seems like a steal in comparison with the other two.

Nikki Beach always goes big, and for Valentines, it’s NO different. For the day of lurveee, their most lavish package comes in the form of a 1-bedroom beach villa. You’ll enjoy free-flow drinks with a set menu, plus a private in-villa brekkie the next morning. CAHUUTE!

This deal is for two people. If you had the cash, who are you taking?

Book it in: Reservations.Dubai@nikkibeachhotels.com or 04 376 6000

Making plans like

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